Occasionally even I am guilty of using the term when too tired or lazy to argue a point, but tonight after a long debate with a very determined colleague it’s time to set the matter straight. There is no such thing as a functional alcoholic. It’s a myth just like Dionysian satyr- a half man/half goat that supposedly made his living drinking wine, chasing women, and dancing- both were created to explain the excesses of man and neither creature can pass the test of logical scrutiny. There are two reasons why I wish to make this case.
The first is obvious, I like to be right. I won our debate this evening because once you define an alcoholic- it is obvious that functional exists nowhere in the description.
The Journal of the American Medical Association defines alcoholism as "a primary, chronic disease characterized by impaired control over drinking, preoccupation with the drug alcohol, use of alcohol despite adverse consequences, and distortions in thinking." ~ Wiki
Basically an alcoholic by definition is someone who has no control over their usage and places a priority on drinking above all things. So the classic “functioning alcoholic” who yes certainly abuses alcohol, cannot be defined an alcoholic because they still have the power to rein in their behavior and place a higher priority in maintaining a specific lifestyle or existing within normal society. When they reach a certain pain threshold they abstain, yet an alcoholic by definition continues drinking “despite adverse consequences.”
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I am not really sure the exact point in my life where my alcohol abuse evolved into addiction. Even as a teenager I had an acute emotional dependence on alcohol, so although it hadn’t yet developed into a physical dependence- was I already an alcoholic at this time? It may be difficult to place the timeline, but it is not too hard to identify the behavior later as a young adult that brought it about.
Carol A. Gotbaum was
While I want to maintain the apolitical nature of the forum here, I would like to remind everyone that the 2008 elections will be here before we know it. I submitted the following question via e-mail to the candidates in tonight’s debate apparently to no avail, but this will not stop me from trying to get it discussed in upcoming debates or at town hall meetings.
A recent study conducted by our friends at
“Right now in the U.S., there are 32 million[2] families with children at risk of abusing drugs and alcohol,” said Steve Pasierb, president and CEO of the Partnership. “The results from this year’s survey reveal a critical need to better support, educate, empower and truly help parents feel more prepared and comfortable discussing the current drug issues this generation of kids is facing. The need has never been greater, nor has this issue been more relevant, as last year’s results showed 1 in 5 teens abused prescription medicine to get high and 1 in 10 abused cough and cold medicines containing the active ingredient dextromethorphan, or DXM. The most recent PATS findings show many parents wrongly perceive the abuse of these drugs to somehow be safer than the use of illegal street drugs. Parents need the facts, to understand how things have changed, and the dangers of intentional Rx/OTC drug abuse must be at the forefront of the discussions with their kids.”
”It reboots the brain so that it takes them back to the day before they started using drugs…"
It must suck to live in Montana. The t-shirt is proof enough for me, but for those of you out there that demand a little deeper analysis I suggest you take a look at the
Biotechnology company 
